The Story of Milo Jay...

*This is going to be an extremely long post, considering I didn't document my pregnancy or anything, and I do want to have it written down for myself somewhere.*

I can't believe so much has happened in the past year.  It all went so fast, and most of it was completely unexpected.  But sometimes that's what's so great about life right?  The unexpected.  It all started last summer.

THE PREGNANCY

Jeff and I had been married for awhile, and had gotten pretty comfortable in our lives as a couple, so we decided it would be a good time to have a kid!  June and July we tried for a baby, and then just as August was starting we kind of both realized that maybe we weren't ready for a family just yet.  I mean we hadn't even been married for a year, and we had some debt we wanted to take care of, and do some reno's on the house we bought before all our money and time and attention went into a family.  Needless to say, I think both of us were kind of relieved that I hadn't gotten pregnant yet, cuz we realized we had gotten a bit ahead of ourselves, and that we still wanted time with just us two.  And then August came.  I knew something was different.  But me being the kind of person that freaks out every single month and pees on a million preggo-sticks if i'm like a day late, no one took me seriously... when I told Jeff I thought I was pregnant he didn't believe me.  In fact, he thought it was basically impossible (which looking back, it should have been) so he wouldn't let me buy yet another pregnancy test, because it was just "a waste of money".  So as the weeks went on and I was still late, I finally went to the dollar store and got a pregnancy test.  Thinking, that if it came back negative i'd only wasted a dollar, and if it was positive I would go and spend the money on a real one just to make sure.  So, I took the test, and sure enough there was THE FAINTEST double line.  Anyways, long story short... I freaked the crap out, skipped out of work, ran and got another test and as you all know it was POSITIVE! I don't think I'd ever been so excited in my life. So I ran home in all my excitement, and pulled out the shirt I had purchased for Jeff months and monhs beforehand that read "One Bad Dad", just for this occasion.  And I put the pregnancy test in a box with the shirt and wrapped it with ribbon.  And put it on the living room table where he would see it as soon as he got home from work.

And then I waited.  And waited.  And waited some more.  For anyone who knows me, I am the most impatient person in the whole world, so this wait nearly KILLED me.  Finally about 5 hours later, he got home.  I was sitting on the bed and he comes in holding the box and says "you got me a present?  How come?" So I told him just to open it.  He opens it and goes "a shirt? gee thanks" with the most let down look on his face.  So then I tell him to read the shirt. He looks at it for a second, and then looks at me so confused, so I say "look at what's under the shirt" and then he catches the pregnancy test and all of a sudden I see the light go on and the BIGGEST smile stream across his face.  I don't know who was more excited, him or me. 

My pregnancy was actually not nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be.  I guess you could say I was one of the lucky ones.  I didn't have any morning sickness, no increased need to pee, or any symptoms really.  I was just super tired for the first trimester, but other than that I had a hard time even convincing myself that I was pregnant.  There were actually many a meltdowns I had to my mom where I was SURE something was wrong, because who doesn't have any sign of pregnancy, even a growing belly??  But then I heard that heartbeat, and I knew it was a real thing.  And just before Christmas we got our ultra sound and found out we were having a boy!  It was exactly what we were hoping for.  And then it was an even more of a real thing. Then the second trimester hit and at about 20 weeks or so I did start to notice my belly growing a bit, and I was having the weirdest cravings for sour candy, and spicy food. I have never been one for hot wings, but man, I think I could have eaten those every day and been happy as a clam. Even the third trimester wasn't as bad as I was expecting.  I had a little swelling, and it was getting harder to bend over and get in and out of bed, but other than that, I felt great! (oh except for the serious heartburn 24/7)  It wasn't until maybe the last month or so where I started to get really uncomfortable, you know, not being able to sleep, walk, eat, or breathe... but even then I still loved it! (Don't mind the ugly bathroom pics.  I'm seriously kicking myself now for not taking cute maternity pictures!)

20 weeks

22 weeks

23 weeks

24 weeks

25 weeks

26 weeks

27 weeks

28 weeks

32 weeks

34 weeks

39 weeks

Over all I LOVED being pregnant.  I loved feeling him move and squirm all the time.  I LOVED the excuse to eat whatever I wanted.  And I think for the first time in my life, I actually liked how I looked, because I was SUPPOSED to have a huge belly, and I liked being able to wear shirts that showed it off. 

MILO'S BIRTH STORY

So I went in for my 37 week appointment and got swabbed and checked and all that fun stuff, and Dr. Khan told me I was about 2cm dilated and about 25% effaced.  And he had already dropped because she could feel his head.  She said I was measuring a little big, and she didn't expect it to be too long before he made his appearance.  The rest of my appointments were the same thing. "he's measuring big, and he's locked and loaded, so really any day"  So of course we took her very seriously and had everything ready to go weeks before my due date... ha yeah right!  We painted our bedroom and en suite less than a week before I was due, and we completely ripped apart our house to clean like 3 days before my due date.  So on the 6 of May (my true due date, even though I had been told for the first 6 months my due date was the 13) Jeff and I decided it was actually going to be awhile until baby came since I hadn't had any kind of contractions or anything, so we might as well start watching all the seasons of One Tree Hill to pass the time.  So that night around midnight we were laying on the couch and all of a sudden we hear this HUGE pop come from my belly as we see baby give a huge kick.  We literally heard the baby kick my stomach, or at least that's what we thought.  I immediately got up to see if it was hard enough to break my water, and nothing.  So I laid back down and we watched a couple more episodes before going to bed around 1:30.  Then at around 3 I woke up and my pants were a little moist, so of course in my half awake state of sleep I thought Jeff was just sweating on me.  I smacked him real hard and he rolled over and I kind of started to doze off again when I felt a little gush again.  Then it kind of dawned on me "that's not Jeff, that's me!"  So I jumped out of bed and went to the bathroom and totally thought I had just wet the bed. So I got myself all cleaned up and went to stand to go back to bed when I noticed I was still peeing myself, and I couldn't stop it! It was just slowly trickling down my legs, so I thought for sure it couldn't be my waters because that's supposed to be a huge gush! I called to Jeff and woke him up, and we actually had to google if your waters breaking could be just a little trickle at a time.  Who knew, it can! I was still having a hard time convincing myself that this could actually mean it was go time, so I had a nice long shower, and then moseyed around getting my bag packed until finally at about 4 when I was still leaking, that I admitted it was in fact my waters, and that we probably should head for the hospital.

We arrived just after 4, and went into the assessment room and got all hooked up on the monitors and everything to see what baby was doing and if I was having any contractions, and about 45 mins. later they admitted me.  But I wasn't really having any real contractions and I was still just 2cm dilated, I had also tested positive for group strep B so they hooked up my IV for some antibiotics and started me on the drip.  Well by that time, it was about 5 in the morning and Jeff and I were so exhausted that we just laid there and tried to get some sleep, which was damn near impossible because unfortunately, all the labor suites were full with scheduled inductions.  So we were stuck in the corner of this tiny room behind some curtains, with the smallest, most uncomfortable beds on the face of the planet!  And since I was all hooked up to IV's and monitors I couldn't move from my back to my sides as I pleased without messing everything up.  So I was basically stuck lying on my back, and Jeff was stuck in the teeny chair next to me. So after a couple hours they came in and turned up my drip and Jeff got me breakfast and called everyone to let them know we were having a baby, and by then I was starting to actually feel the contractions, but they weren't too bad.  I was more just sore from laying on my back on a small piece of wood for hours.  So again we tried to get some sleep.  Then at about 10 they finally let me out of bed to pee and to walk around for 25 mins.  That was it, just 25 mins. but oh man it was good to get out of bed and off my back! So 10:30 I got back to bed and Dr. Khan came and checked me and I was ALMOST a 3.  I just remember thinking it was so funny, because I had read all my friends blogs and almost every one says that they were SURE they had really progressed because the contractions were longer and harder, and then they're all disappointed when they haven't.  And there I was SO SURE I was at like a 6 or a 7 and then finding out I had progressed not even one full cm.  Needless to say, I was pissed.  So back on the drip I went.  And the suckiest part was, my contractions were strong enough that I could have had an epidural, but since I wasn't in a birthing suite, they didn't have enough room in my tiny little corner to give me one :(  So all I got was lousy morphine...  Which is crap by the way. You still feel everything, it just makes you sleepy, which I already was because I'd only gotten an hour of sleep.  So they upped my drip yet again, and I laid there again trying to catch some shut eye, just breathing through the contractions, all while listening to the lady down the hall scream bloody murder for hours.  Finally at about 2:00 when that round of the drip was done Dr. Khan checked me and alas, I was still at a 3.  Talk about depressing.  That's when she broke the news, that because I had been on the drip for so long, they had maxed it out, and I couldn't have any more.  And because I had only progressed 1cm in the 9 hours I had been on the drip that I was going to need to have a c-section. To be honest, I wasn't even sad about it.  I was scared to death of pushing a baby out anyways, and I was just so over being in that hard bed, that all I wanted to do was just get up and get things over with.  Of course, I did ask if there was any point in me trying to labor some more, to which she responded no. There was no point. My labor was going nowhere even with the drip, so why would it progress without it?  So we asked how much time we had and she told us we'd have a baby within an hour.  So I sent Jeff out to the car to get the camera and my bags and to call my mom, and as soon as he left there were like 7 people in my little corner.  One person was shoving stockings on my legs, while another was trying to get my IV switched over, and another was trying to get a catheter in, while another was telling me about all the risks of a c-section, and another was telling me about an epidural, and another was trying to get me to drink this nasty drink... Talk about chaos! Then like 20 mins later everyone starts freaking out about "where's the husband?!" "we need to get to the OR!" "We can't wait anymore!"  The whole thing was just ridiculous.  Finally Jeff got back and they basically ripped his clothes off and put the scrubs on for him, that's how fast they were trying to get us out of there. And before I knew it I was getting raced down the hall into the OR, got my epidural, and we were having a baby!

 C-sections are the strangest thing.  I mean I knew there was a baby inside of me, and I knew they were going to take it out, but it almost didn't even seem real as I was lying there on the table.  I couldn't see, or feel anything. And I really didn't have to do anything.  And at 2:42pm on May 7 I heard Dr. Khan say "whoa, he's got alot of hair!" and all of a sudden the nurse was holding this dark haired baby up to me, and Milo Jay was born!  I'm not gonna lie, it took me a minute or so for it all to sink in and to realize, whoa... this is MY baby! But as they sat him on my chest and I got to hold him, and look at him and calm him down it did hit me. And I was so in love! I always laugh when I hear new moms say that, but it is actually true.  You don't realize how much you can love a person, or how much you'll love your kids until you're actually holding them, and looking at their perfect little faces.  And you don't know how much you can love your spouse, or partner, until your looking at each other look at this perfect little baby and all you can think is "we made this".  Talk about the most perfect feeling in the whole world. Its nuts!  haha so I got to hold him while they stitched me all up, and then the worst part of a c-section (well, minus the recovery... BARF!) they let Jeff take my baby to get weighed and measured and all that fun stuff while I had to go to recovery.  I don't think I've ever been so sad.  And, since i'm the most impatient person in the world, that wait in the recovery room was THE WORST!  I mean I was completely awake and coherent because I'd only had an epidural, so all I could do was lie there and think about my baby and what they were doing, and where they were, and how much he weighed, and if my mom was here yet, and all those kinds of things, but I just had to lie there and wait for the freezing to somewhat wear off.  Finally after 2 hours I got wheeled up to my room and they brought me my baby so I could REALLY hold him.  And he was perfect. 

Milo's first picture!

First family photo

Gramma and Milo

Milo Jay Britton

Better family photo haha

First time Jeff held Milo.